Okotoks Raiders Jr A

Emily Nerland | May 12, 2013

 
If you were to ask anyone affiliated with the Raiders how to best describe the organization, you’d most likely hear the same answer: It’s family.
 
And, as with any family, one of the most important pieces is the mother.
 
Christina Fehr said she doesn’t know exactly how she became that mother figure for more than a decade of Raiders players, but she does know it’s been one of the most rewarding experiences of her life.
 
“I don’t even know how it happened. I guess it started out as having them kind of as part of the family. We’d go on vacation and we’d take all the kids. We tried early on to get Jesse on college campuses and we did it as our family vacation for years. That way it wasn’t something out there that people couldn’t imagine themselves being there,” Fehr said. “They had had their feet on that ground, it was like, ‘Hey, this is something I can do. I can be like that kid who just walked by there or that kid who just threw me the lacrosse ball.’ It just kind of visually making that connection for them.”
 
Fehr said they would take kids from other programs, in addition to the Raiders, as the kids got older. It was before anything formal could be scheduled for kids to see schools, just Super 300 and various camps to gain exposure.
 
“I was booking the flights, the hotels. I’d get ‘Mrs. Fehr this, Mrs. Fehr that, oh my gosh, I don’t have my passport.’ Whatever it might be, I just have to work out all the logistical things,” Fehr said. “And you don’t even realize it’s happening, that you are being that person for them, and then all of a sudden you’re at the family bbq, a Raiders bbq and you ask, ‘What’s happening?’ and they reach out to you.”
 
Fehr describes one particular instance when she was at a bar-b-que with the team asked one kid what he was thinking of doing after graduating high school. He said he was thinking about going to do drilling, but she said she saw so much more potential in him.
 
“I was just like, ‘You are too smart for that. You can go to college. You can do this. If you want to go to school, we can find a place you want to go. We can find a way that you can pay for it,’” Fehr said. “All it takes is that little bit at the right time, just enough to open that door for them. And the kid is going to have to walk through it, but you just see it. It’s almost like you just have to make that happen. You have to kind of guide it a little bit but you can’t force it. Maybe the kid doesn’t want it, once or twice, maybe the kid veers off to the right or left, but in the end the kid always ends up in a little better than they were.”
 
This kid did end up going to school, and on his graduation day, he sent the Fehr’s a card.
 
“He sent us a thank you card that said, ‘Mr and Mrs Fehr, I never could have done this without you,’” Fehr recalled. “It was just that touch point at the right time. We’ve all had teachers or people that did that for us. It’s just someone that isn’t hanging over you all the time. I always say there is a reason we only had one kid. It took four years to get Jesse and nothing happened after, and I think it was always because our house was always full of different kids. And kids just feel comfortable. If there’s an issue with them you can pick up on it because you know them and you can see it and you can ask, you know, ‘What’s going on?’ You kind of just probe a little bit, and with that trust you’ve built, you can start to help open that door.”
 
For Fehr, no card was necessary. Seeing each kid come into his own is the only thanks she needs.
 
“I think when it comes to helping these kids, I get out 100 times more than what I put in. Just seeing the kids who got their education, whether that be a trade or a school, and that feeling that you’ve had a small part in opening a small door that they never probably thought was even possible,” Fehr said. “And so many of the boys say that. They say, ‘ I never thought I could have ever done that.’ And then knowing they have the basics now of creating another opportunity for another person in life. Or coaching, helping out on coaching, just giving else back to the community. And it just starts there, getting them on to a good start, really. I’d say that’s probably the most rewarding. And seeing them after; seeing them so confident and you just know that there’s that connection.”
 
Fehr isn’t the only mom making a difference. She said that there were always two or three moms every year that have taken up the reigns so that the Raiders organization could be the best it could be.
 
“We got to a point where I couldn’t do all of those things, so we’d actually have to pick, hey, here’s a team manager role. So, all of the traveling, the food, the uniform coordination, who is going to be washing and drying the uniforms, you know, they did all of the normal things a team manager would do on any hockey team. From organizing gala events and fundraisers and just activities that we would get together and do together. Just those things that made us, not just showing up on the floor and at the arena, just a lot of off the floor stuff as well,” Fehr said.
 
“The moms that we’ve had in our program have just been phenomenal. Like Colleen Werschke. She was basically our general manager and team mom for four or five years, because two of her sons actually played for us,” Fehr said. “People like Colleen are just phenomenal. People like Patsy Hayes, people like Jennifer Pollock who doesn’t even have a kid on the team but are always there, from a governor and a direction perspective. We had Roberta Sherman, was a real key pivotal player.”
 
Fehr thinks the way the team is run–where the ownership through the coaches and everyone involved cares about the kids as human beings and not just players– is a main reason the moms have been so great.

 
“I think they really believed in what we were doing, and saw that we believed in their kids. They saw that we saw family and education as the first and foremost priorities. They could see there was something more going on than just seeing what was going on on the floor,” Fehr said. “They know they love coming to lacrosse, seeing their kids play, it would always be something they’d cherish. But they also knew it’d be something more, something beyond that. So I think they just sustained a lot of energy in the system and a lot of support.”
 
With so many great mothers playing such important roles within the organization, Fehr said the Raiders organization has been able to continue to keep a players-first mentality.
 
“I think the kids just always kind of knew, this isn’t just some sports team that the coach runs the show and what happens, happens. This is a family enterprise, and these kids were part of this family. It’s about all of us, it’s not just showing up and we don’t care about what you did last night or what’s happening at home or if you’ve got money to pay your rent or any of those kinds of things. Because we know all of those things are going to affect you,” Fehr said. “Every kid is different. Mostly they just knew that we really cared about what they were doing. I always saw so much potential in all the kids. I just thought ‘That kid is really going to be something.’ They all have good hearts, and I just love them. I can’t explain it any more than that.”